Richard Hawley

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PostPosted: Wed Feb 01, 2006 2:32 pm 
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Gimmie 6 !
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Location: Church of Ryan Adams
english man, scottish man and irish man walk into a bar

landlord says

is this some sort of joke! :wink:

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PostPosted: Wed Feb 01, 2006 3:52 pm 
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Too much time on my hands

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man walks into psychiatrist wearing only cling film underpants

psychiatrist says " I can clearly see your nuts"

or should that be you're nuts

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PostPosted: Wed Feb 01, 2006 3:53 pm 
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Too much time on my hands

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I have now become regular, that's a great relief

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PostPosted: Wed Feb 01, 2006 4:27 pm 
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Gimmie 6 !
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did you hear about the scarecrow who won a nobel prize.

he was out standing in his field!!

not so good to read as to hear, but still good

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PostPosted: Wed Feb 01, 2006 6:13 pm 
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that's my kind of joke

did you hear about the chef who boiled a hyena?

made himself a laughing stock!!

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PostPosted: Wed Feb 01, 2006 6:23 pm 
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Gimmie 6 !
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erpisle norrid wrote:
that's my kind of joke

did you hear about the chef who boiled a hyena?

made himself a laughing stock!!


haha

that is good, i have a few chef friends, i'm sure they will appreciate that, obviously i'll pass it off as one of my own

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PostPosted: Wed Feb 01, 2006 7:12 pm 
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Hawley Super-Groupie
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How sick are we allowed to be?

Anyone here heard the one about the two tramps and the lucky railway line?


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PostPosted: Wed Feb 01, 2006 7:35 pm 
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Well here goes apologies in advance!

Two old tramps are walking along a railway line when tramp number one says to the other, "This is my lucky line?"

"Why's that?" enquires the second tramp.

"Well I wuz walking along here last week and found a huge hamper filled to the brim with fine food & wine & had myself the finest meal of my whole life!"

Not to be outdone the second tramp then proclaims, "Well this is my lucky line as well because the other day I came across a beautiful naked woman bound to the track & I untied her and we had incredible sex all day long!"

"That is incredible!" says the first tramp and asks, "Did she give you a blowjob?"

To which the second tramp answers, "No. I couldn't find her head"


Last edited by Hipster on Fri Feb 03, 2006 4:08 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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PostPosted: Wed Feb 01, 2006 9:07 pm 
^^^^ :*: :*: :*: :*:

A young woman buys a mirror at an antique shop, and hangs it on her bathroom door. One evening, while getting undressed, she playfully says "Mirror, mirror, on my door, make my bustline forty four".

Instantly, there is a brilliant flash of light, and her breasts grow to enormous proportions. Excitedly, she runs to tell her husband what happened, and in minutes they both return.

This time the husband crosses his fingers and says "Mirror mirror on the door, make my penis touch the floor!".

Again, there's a bright flash...and his legs fall off.


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PostPosted: Thu Feb 02, 2006 11:22 am 
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Hawleytastic!
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:D :D :D

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PostPosted: Thu Feb 02, 2006 12:43 pm 
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The 'Hipster' and 'Halina1979' jokes are way out in front!! - Class! :*:

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PostPosted: Thu Feb 02, 2006 1:16 pm 
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Gimmie 6 !
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didn't realise we could be this wild, right where shall i begin

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PostPosted: Thu Feb 02, 2006 3:15 pm 
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Too much time on my hands

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Location: manchester
there's no need for "blue" material

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PostPosted: Thu Feb 02, 2006 3:35 pm 
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Gimmie 6 !
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one from the old school here and disgusting so i'm going out on a limb

little jimmy comes down stairs on xmas day and says
"grandma has a prawn upstairs".
His mother says
"you must be mistaken we had turkey not prawns".
little jimmy now a little upset says
"no she does have a prawn she does".

so mother pondering on what he is on about goes upstairs with jimmy to investigate further. on entering the bedroom they see grandma laid on the bed with her skirt round her neck and pants/bloomers round her ankles.
jimmy points
"look grandma has a prawn".
mother
"no jimmy thats not a prawn, thats grandmas tupence".

"well it tastes like a prawn" jimmy replies

I APOLOGISE WHOLE HEARTEDLY

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PostPosted: Thu Feb 02, 2006 4:14 pm 
:shock: :silent: :pr:

Paul...that is beyond the pail! :shock:


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